Authentic Friendships

Can you feel the change?

Oct 01, 2022

Ohhh, can you feel the chill in the air? The leaves are all changing colors and beginning  to fall to the ground. I love this time of  year! Where I live in Minnesota there is a spectacular new landscape every morning in October. As I walk my dogs at the beginning of each day I get to  take in all of the new color combinations and configurations of the foliage. It is such an amazing way to start the day, the adventure of walking around the neighborhood to see what has changed over night is exhilarating!

Does change excite you, scare you, are you indifferent to it? 

How do you want to handle the change that occurs in your life? It’s a choice you know, one of my favorite quotes of all times is from John Maxwell, “Change is inevitable, growth is optional”.  Isn’t that fantastic!?! There is always going to be change, that is part of life, we can’t do anything about that. But what we do with the change is entirely up to us. We can use it as a tool for growth and expansion if we let it. Or we can let it bring us down and defeat us.

What about when something in a relationship changes? There are many different ways that we can view change, this is where choice comes in.


We can be annoyed when someone in our life makes a big change or we can embrace and accept it. When the change is unexpected, are you willing to ask questions?  Do you automatically assume that it is about you? What if it has nothing to do with you? I encourage you to be curious about how and when things shift and change in a relationship. Often when we can be accepting it can help grow our relationship, and isn’t that ultimately what we want?


Growth happens outside of our comfort zone, and change that leads to growth can be  exhilarating! It’s important for us to have respect for change that occurs in a relationship. When we respect each other's right to shift and change we are providing the opportunity to grow closer together. Our fear will tell us that change will hurt our relationship, when in fact resisting change can be detrimental to that relationship. Respect and embrace change!


It’s fascinating how we can get stuck in seeing things from only our own point of view. When we are willing to stop and look at things from a different perspective we open our minds to another way. When we are willing to have an open mind, we are creating the opportunity to compromise. Rarely are things black or white, all right or all wrong, compromise is allowing room for all points of view. Despite what our ego may tell us, compromise can actually bring us closer together versus splitting us apart.


It’s messy to step into the areas in friendships that are uncomfortable. But growth does not happen when things are all neat and tidy. When we really want to grow we allow ourselves to step outside of what is most comfortable. Change happens when we are willing to embrace mutual growth in our relationships and make space for things to evolve. It’s not necessarily comfortable to make room for change but is essential for the growth of our relationships.

In Friendship, 


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