Whimsy in FriendshipsApr 01, 2022
What is Whimsy in Friendship?
“You must not ever stop being whimsical. And you must not, ever, give anyone else the responsibility for your life.” -Mary Oliver
The month of April we want to focus on the concept of Whimsy. I love the word whimsy, it brings to mind playfulness, fun, and a sense of silliness. One of the things that I most enjoy about my friendships is laughter, in fact I would say it is a fundamental requirement for me in my friendships. If we can’t laugh together and be a little bit silly at times, we will probably never be more than acquaintances. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean that there is never any seriousness, of course there is that too, but I need the lighthearted, whimsy at times as well.
Last Monday I woke up way too early with a mission to get things done, I was 100% focused on my to-do list for the day. I was going over it in my head as I was getting ready, I was giving myself a pep talk on how organized I was going to be and how great it was going to be to check off each item as it was accomplished. I wasn’t really paying attention to what I was doing, I was getting my head in the productive day at hand.
First on my list was to walk the dogs. I got downstairs and grabbed my phone and went to put it in my pants pocket like I normally do, and the pocket wasn’t there, that was strange. After a quick assessment of the situation I realized that I had put them on inside out. Annoyed with this delay in getting stuff done I quickly took them off and got them on the right side out and we left for our walk. All while walking I was uncomfortable, my pants were just not fitting well, what was happening? I wore these exercise pants all the time and now they just felt weird. Well, half way through the walk I realized what the problem was, they were now on backwards.
It took me 3 attempts to get my pants on correctly on this day. 3 attempts to put on pants! I have been dressing myself for nearly 50 years now, you would think that it would not be such a challenge wouldn’t you?
I think it can be too easy to get bogged down in the day to day “have to’s” of life that we forget how great it is to connect on the funny things too. I didn’t have to tell anybody about it taking me 3 attempts to put on pants this day, but I did, and it was hilarious to tell and retell the story all day long with the friends I got to connect with. It brought a sense of whimsy to my conversations, the ability to laugh at myself and see the funny in how focused on getting things done I was that I forgot to pay attention to the simple tasks at hand.
If I am not intentional about my days I can easily put much more value on having been productive and accomplished than on if I had a good time while doing it. What I know now is that I need both, productivity and whimsy in my days and in my relationships. The balance of the two is vitally important to my happiness and success as I define it for myself.
Whimsy is Lightheartedness
To be lighthearted means to not take everything too seriously. To find the humor in the situations. Life is full of very serious happenings and the most interesting people are the ones who can add a little bit of lightheartedness to any situation. How can you bring more lightheartedness into your friendships?
Whimsy is an expression of Individuality
Being able to express your more whimsical side can be a beacon for others to see your individuality and be drawn to you. Being yourself is one of the greatest gifts you can give to the world. We don’t need everyone to be exactly the same, individuality is way more interesting!
Whimsy is finding the Adventure
At the heart of whimsy is a seed of adventure. Being curious about what is possible can be the start of one of your life’s greatest adventures. Why not stop and dream with your friends about what the future could hold if you added a bit more whimsy to the mix?
Whimsy is Longevity
Whimsy helps build trust in a friendship. When you can let your guard down and allow others to see the more whimsical side of you, you are opening the door to a deeper friendship. The deeper the friendship, the more likely it is to have longevity!
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